I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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