But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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