My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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