can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
