Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
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