Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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