If i come over, it means nothing
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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