Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
dude i'm inner monologue high
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
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