is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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