is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
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it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
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She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
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