Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
jump out the window naked night went bad
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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