so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I woke up under a house in Key West
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