Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is Oprah even human
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
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