we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
