uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Randomize
