I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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