she was so not down for the gang bang
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
