Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
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