Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize