I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
