Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
