i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Let's paint friendship bongs
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
