carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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