does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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