Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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