ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
