Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
You took a bar mat shot.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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