I wanna bring you to show and tell
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Holy shit dude........stairs
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