I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
