summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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