we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize