The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Randomize
