I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
