Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
