did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
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