what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
