Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
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I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
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He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.