Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I have post one night stand depression
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
