Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
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