Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
