I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Randomize