She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
