Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Randomize
