my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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