yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
We are all done wearing pants today
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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