Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Randomize
