I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
Come see our sink grown plant.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
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