She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
