the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
