bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
