Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
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